My word for 2014 is time.

Making time for things that I want to do, dedicating enough time to my work, finding time to relax, taking my time and not rushing through the day.

I could have had a whole host of words; calm, changes, positivity, brave, embrace, thrive but this year I want to focus on time.

I learnt a lot in 2013, I also changed a lot. And these changes haven't particularly come in my habits and routines but in my attitudes and the thoughts inside my head.

It's not something I have particularly talked about before, probably because it took a while to admit it to myself, but I have struggled with anxiety and stress for many years. I am a natural worrier and to me little things can become big problems very quickly. I could ruminate for hours, days, over something trivial that someone said or didn't say. I would worry about whether I had planned things well enough for the future. It could be little things like 'would I make my train and have time to get lunch and pop into a certain shop?' that would make me feel physically anxious, or it could be bigger things like 'where am I going to live next year? What if I never get it sorted before I have to move?' that just roll around in my mind. I also found that my anxiety began to increase in social situations and I could seem withdrawn when in groups. And sometimes I can still feel these worries, but that is normal.

I think what I found hardest was saying I had anxiety meant that I wasn't in control, and I hated not having control. So I decided to make a change. I decided that I didn't want to let my mind be in control and instead I wanted to be.

Since then I have taken a number of steps to help myself. I started to go to mindfulness mediation sessions which were put on several times a week by my university, and they are the best thing I have ever done. It teaches you how to take a step back from the busyness of life and the busyness of your own mind. It has taught me how to live in the now. Even though I only go once a week I have been able to apply this to areas all across my life. I feel calmer and more relaxed because of it. I would recommend it to anyone.
I have also been more open and have started to share how I feel with others. This was a big step for me but it has helped me to feel more comfortable and confident. I am lucky to have the family and friends around me that I do.

So back to my word. I want to give myself time to carry on with the changes that I have already made. This may mean taking a few moments each day just to breath and relax or it may be sitting down with a book to inspire me or maybe even taking up yoga as a way to focus. I want to take time to appreciate what I have now. Stop worrying about the things in the past that I cannot change and keep learning to just let things happen in the future.

I also think I might buy something as a little reminder to myself of how far I have come with the changes I have made and the journey I still have to go through. I love the simplicity of these bands and may get the 'Live In The Moment' or 'Breathe' quote.

I was inspired to write this post by a number of things. Firstly this post that Rosie wrote a few days ago which really struck a cord with me and I have already bought Eat, Pray, Love onto my kindle to read. And then I came across a post on Stephanie's blog which she had written as part of #making2014count and I decided to use one word rather than a list of things I want to achieve this year. You can find more details and get involved in the link up on Kelli's blog.
I would love to know if you have written a post like this or to hear about your journeys.

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It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas

University got the better of me again. Since I last posted I have watched Catching Fire, been to Manchester's christmas markets, seen the Fratellis live, spent a weekend at home, had a number of christmas meals and socials, been to a christmas ball and a panto and finally come home for christmas! I wish I could say coming home for christmas means a lovely holiday off university and away from work unfortunately it's not. I have 4 exams in January and the revision has already begun!
Over the next month though I am really hoping to write some posts about the things I have been doing each week. I love reading back about those things myself in the future, but it also makes me happy that I can share my experiences with others.
But to start with here are a couple of quick festive snaps. I cannot wait for christmas!!

Models Own - Pukka Purple with a top coat of Ibiza Mix 

Santas grotto in the Arndale! 

Elfie selfie! (credit to my mum for that one) 

Our house christmas dinner - very proud we managed to cook this!

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My Life In Photos #4

This past month I have been madly busy with second year university work, training and playing a lot more cricket and social activities one after the other and it feels like I haven't had a moment to stop. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it when I have things to do and I have really enjoyed playing lots of sport and going out with friends. But sometimes you can't beat a good night in with a film or a book.
I find that when everything gets so busy I start to distract myself and my concentration just slides, which only makes getting work done even harder! So this weekend I had a break and it was lovely. And now I am getting back to working super (is that an acceptable word to use?) hard.

I said back when i started blogging again that I knew I wouldn't be able to blog all the time and that has been true. But it's still frustrating when I have a list of blog posts I want to write and not enough hours in the day to write them. Hopefully I will find time soon to show you my new purchases and christmas wishlists. For now you can look at my 'what i've been up to' photos.

1. Night out with my housemate

2. Bonfire night!

3. My facepaint for halloween

4. Celebratory meal for Diwali

5. My new hat

6. Fancy dress for an Alice In Wonderland themed night out

7. Waiting for the train when visiting my grandad

8. Trains getting involved in movember!

9. Sneak peak at a future post #bloggerbookswap

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My Life In Photos #3

1. Why are there christmas things in supermarkets already?!

2. A beautiful 7am sky

3. Listening to the football and eating chocolate

4. Fancy meal my housemate cooked us

5. Impromptu shoe shopping

6. Never too old for crayons at pizza hut

7. My latest nail art

8. Summed me up one evening

9. Sneak peek of a future post

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A Gift, This Park

Yesterday was a really beautiful autumn day. It wasn't too chilly, there were only a few clouds on a blue sky and the sun was shining. I might have had a mountain of work to do but it would have been a shame to stay inside all day! So I took a little wander through the park which is a minute from my house.

I went with the intention of finding conkers to fill up an empty jar. I thought it would make a unique little decoration. But either the squirrels or other children beat me too it (pesky kids!). So instead I just have these pretty pictures.

 Love all the colours of the different leaves at this time of year. Would love to try this idea that I found on pinterest!

 What a cool way to get around!

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My Life in Photos #2

1. Unconventional salad

2. Blackberry picking back home

3. Pancakes made by my housemates. Best hangover cure!

4. Our fancy dress for Pangea - Circle of Life

5. Primark snood

6. Chilled music to work to

7. A colourful stir fry for tea

8. My girls and me

9. I joined the university cycling club

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My Own Space

I moved back to uni about 2 weeks ago to start my second year. I still can't believe that I am already in 2nd year, feels two minutes since I moved into halls as a fresher!
This year I am living in a house with 4 of my friends from first year. We have spent most of our first weeks going out, sleeping of hangovers, eating and being mentors to freshers. I love being in a house now though and having a shared space and a big kitchen. Even if it does mean we have to take out our own bins and hoover the floors!
I have definitely made my room into my own little space. Having a double bed again is heaven and I am starfishing to the max. I am also slowly building a hoard of cushions to adorn my bed with. The only thing thats missing is some cute bunting or fairy lights to go round my walls.

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My Life In Photos #1

1. On the way to watch my local football team, Bradford City!

2. Finally found this screensaver for my mac.

3. My mums pasta bake.

4. Cricket club outing to the pub.

5. Moved into my new house in Manchester.

6. Cooked a green veg risotto for my housemates.

7. Pineapple and wine with my best friend.

8 + 9. Our first night out of 2nd year.

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Leeds Festival

This is the second time I have been to Leeds festival, but this time I did it a bit differently. I volunteered with my 2 best friends. And I had the most amazing few days!

We got theee best shift pattern and so got to see every day of music.

Day 1

Arrived in sunny weather and spent the afternoon putting our tent up and registering at the office. Then in the evening we cracked open the cans and got to know the people in the tents around us. And what a lovely bunch they were too.

Day 2

This was our first shift from 10-5 and it was simply just manual labour! If you've ever been to a festival before then you know how hard it is to carry bags across the fields to where you want to camp. Especially with the weight of about 3 crates in the bottom. Well we were just carrying everyones heaviest bags, and then putting their tents up when they found somewhere to camp. However we were often rewarded with some tasty snacks or a cheeky can or two which made the afternoon go faster!

The best tent was one where 3 of the poles had snapped, yet we still managed to put it up for them and it stayed up all weekend!

Day 3

After a relaxing morning we went for an afternoon shift, 5-1am. It was a fairly long and uneventful shift because most people were at the DJ parties. That was until the heavens opened at about 10pm and everything (literally through to my underwear!) was soaked. After that the typical 'festival mud' started.

Day 4

This was the first day of music and luckily our tent had managed to hold our through all the rain. So we set off first to see AlunaGeorge. On the way I got stopped by a modelling agency. This is the 3rd time in 3 months it has happened! Next we saw the Editors, which was the only time we managed to sit on the floor before the whole place turned to mud! We followed up with Frankie and the Heartstring (a band I had been meaning to see for quite a while), Haim, Disclosure and Fall Out Boy. We topped it all off with Biffy Clyro who were a-m-a-zing. I managed to find myself on top of a three person tower which was literally the highlight of my festival!

Day 5

There was less music I wanted to see on this day so it was all fairly relaxed. I ate some weird mac and cheese with mustard in for lunch, not recommended. Then we went and watched Bastille in the NME tent who is near perfect in my opinion. And later on saw the full set of Greenday, just so we could sing along to American Idiot. It was totally worth it. This day was memorable for Piccadilly party in 3ft of watery mud (which i dropped my phone in, found, and it still worked. Hallelujah!) until 4:30am and then red camp dj until 6am and then a looong trek back to our campsite. Had such a good night, at least compared to the girl we met whilst walking back who seem to have had a series of bad luck. Oh and I forgot to mention - it rained all day.

Day 6

This was my favourite day (apart from Biffy) by far! We saw the 1975 - who I wasn't hugely impressed by - before going to see Foals on the main stage. I have wanted to see Foals for so long that I may have weed myself a little when they came on. They were awesome. And it wasn't raining! We stayed to watch Chase and Status who were pretty epic. I was surprised by how many of their songs I knew, bonus points to me. Then, controversially to some, I chose Alt-J over Eminem (although I stayed for the very start of his set). Alt-J were incredible. I became a little entranced by their music it was that good.

We were then straight onto a 1-9am shift which was like living through the apocalypse. The number of fires we had to put out, thefts we had to report and more generally miles we had to walk through rubbish and mud I think I deserve a bloomin' medal! Strawberry and nutella waffles at 6am cheered me up slightly though.

One of the best weekends of my summer by far.

I am thinking about creating a post more specifically about my time volunteering. Its positives and negatives, how I got into it and whether I would do it again if anyone would be interested?

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Outer Hebrides

I'm going to do a small series of posts showing a few things I have done over the summer holidays. For our family holiday this year we went to 3 islands in the Outer Hebrides. I've been there once before when I was much younger and it really is such a beautiful part of the world. We travelled up at the end of July when there was a heatwave across England, expecting to be greeted with rain and fog. Instead we had glorious sun for 2 weeks!

We visited a beach almost every day and because the islands are fairly small there was usually never anyone else on the beaches. The only thing that would have made it better is if the sea was warm!

The family friends that we were staying with had collected buoys for many years and assembled them in the back yard. The younger generation had great fun playing out on them right up until sunset.

Also a few of us went to the islands annual music festival whilst we were there. There was some great traditional bagpipes as well as bands playing covers of songs. One band played Mr Brightside and I may have turned 14 again..

Later in the holiday we also did some walks up some beautiful hills which left us with views for miles and miles. For me this is holiday was the perfect way to relax and spend time with my family. If only it was closer to home!

x

The End Of Summer, A New Start To Blogging

This is me and my five housemates at our end of year ball in May. I managed to finish and pass all of first year! It actually feels like such a long time ago now since we've had all of summer in between.
I said in my last post, which was so long ago that I would be surprised it anyone actually remembers my existence, that I was hoping to start blogging again over summer when I had more time. In the end I was just enjoying summer too much that I never got round to writing it all down. But lately I have been looking at some of the blogs I used to read religiously and I began to really miss it. So here I am. Writing a new post.
I am starting university again later this month so I know I won't have huge amounts of time but I want to blog when I can. I have lots of ideas and love being able to look back at my blog in the future as an online diary. I have made a few changes to the layout and am hoping to make a few more as I learn how to code html better (or just make it up as I go along!). So hopefully you guys will stick around.

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A Rather Long Absence

Ok, so you may have noticed i haven't been around for well.. quite a while. Since coming back to uni after christmas and starting semester 2 things got a lot busier and I found myself coming back in the afternoon and having a huuuge list of new blogs. Which was great, because i love reading them all! But it did mean it took time away from other things. So I decided to stop.

Sorry this post has been so long coming. The whole possible 'end of google reader' and switch to bloglovin prompted me to write something. I really hope that during the holidays and going into summer I can get back to writing a few posts because i do miss it. Especially the inspiration i got from so many peoples blogs. I have followed everyone i can on bloglovin so that i can still read all your blogs in the future :) in the meantime i am still on twitter and instagram.

Hope everyone is well and i really hope i have a bit more time in the future!

x

A snow day

Thought i would spam you with a few photos of the snow round where i live, i know you probably havent seen enough already.. :D

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